This is a really rough draft of a scene that popped into my head this morning... No offense intended to any Opie's, Randolf's, or Xavier's out there - and all apologies in case I've misrepresented your respective lunchtime positions. Laugh, it's funny.

Opie (entering): Hey, guys! How's it going!? Have I got some stories to tell you!

Randolf: Jesus, that's an ugly shirt! And how'd you learn to walk that way?

Xavier: Your shirt isn't much better, Randolph. At least mine's made from natural fibers.

Opie: Eh, my shirt's fine. It was free, it fits, and it was in the closet when I got up.

Randolf: And did you have to come in that gas-guzzling smogmobile of yours? I wish you'd driven an electric car.

Xavier: ...or maybe a bicycle cleverly constructed from coconuts! It's biodegradable and partially digestible!

Opie: Er, um, okay. My car's pretty cool! It was free, it runs, and it came with a steering wheel and automatic transmission! It could do with a wheel cover and a seat belt, though.

Randolf: When I drive, I prefer a stick shift and a system of ropes and pullies to steer.

Xavier: I like a conveyance that helps make me one with the nature of the world.

Opie: That all sounds like a pain in the ass. How'd you guys get here?

Randolf: I walked - I've got comfortable shoes. I do have a fun scooter in the garage, though.

Xavier: I took the bus, though sometimes I walk. I'm seriously working on that coconut bicycle, though.

Opie: Yikes! How do you guys get much done during the day?

Randolf: Oh, I get by. I get up really early and start writing, having woken from dreams of electric flying cars I'll have in the future.

Xavier: I blog and write search engines. That keeps me plenty busy.

Opie: Ugh. So, anyway. I'll shop for a hybrid or something this week, but I'm not giving up my car. Now, do you guys want to hear my stories, or what?